It's About Time...

I know...

We have been delinquent. The everyday takes over and the last thing I think about is spending time on the computer in the midst of diapers and discipline.

I'm out of practice...

But I thought this news was big enough to inform anyone who is still waiting...

We spent the day at Children's Memorial Hospital yesterday. We left the house at 7:45 in the am and returned about the same time in the pm. If the number of doctors who met with us had been individual appointments our co-pay alone would have been $120! (That's $20 a visit... you do the math.) One of my favorite moments of the day was when a handful of medical professionals walked in and started talking with us, one of them, in his white coat, asked Lia to open to say "ahhh", stuck a flashlight in her mouth and walked out. I turned to Luciana and said, "And who was that?" We both shrugged our shoulders. He was never seen again.

Our hope and prayer was that we would have a plan by the end of the day. That prayer was answered.

The next three steps are insurance, tooth extraction and ear tubes, and then the closing of the palate.

First, we wait to hear from our insurance about what will be covered under medical (hopefully all of it), what will be covered under dental, and what will come from our own pockets (hopefully a $20 co-pay.)

Second, will be the tooth extraction and ear tubes which should take place in the middle of September. There are a couple of teeth that are in the way, making the closing of the palate more difficult.

Third, the surgeon will remove part of the bone in the roof of her mouth, take part of a rib to create a more natural curve for the upper gum line, and close the palate. She said that after this surgery, Lia will have a very different profile. The little face that we have become so accustomed to will be no more.

I wish you could have been there to watch their minds at work. It was absolutely amazing. The surgeon would come in, take a look in her mouth, tell us what she thought and go to talk to the team. Then the dentist would come in, look at her teeth and say that something else seemed to make more sense, and he would bring the surgeon back. She would take another look, they'd both step out and pull in the surgeon in charge of the tooth extraction. Meanwhile they each had at least one medical student trailing behind getting the schooling of a lifetime!

Finally, at about 5:00, the surgeon came back to explain what had been going over our heads for most of the day. She also told us that she will be using a tool to spread her gum line so her teeth will grow where they are supposed to. She said this would take six months with spacers. She will do it in 60 minutes during the surgery!

Our daughter is in capable hands, to put it mildly.

Please pray for her. Although this must all be done, and done as quickly as possible, we can't help but think of the violent act of ripping out bone and replacing it with other bone from her rib. Her life will be infinitely better for it, but you can't explain that to a two and a half year old. Pray for the comfort of the Father.

Thank you.

Lia Cried

Lia cried the other day. If you've been to our house you are probably thinking, "That's nothing new..."

If you were her older sister you'd be thinking, "I wish she would stop crying..."

Before I go any further, let me remind you that she is a 2 1/2 years old. They tend to cry.

But this was different. I took Lia into her Sunday school class as I do every week. She knows right where it is and which door to walk through. She is always two steps ahead of me. And just like every other week, I waved and said goodby before I headed out the door. Then it happened. She cried. She ran towards me, raised her hands in the air and she cried.

Once again, jumped by my own emotions that I didn't quite understand, I said, "Oh honey, that's so good!" The other parents, who had been trying to sneak out without their toddlers noticing looked at me questioningly.

I put her down and sat with her. We played with the toys for a few minutes and I got up to leave. Again I said,"goodbye." Again, she cried. At this point the other parents who were hoping to catch at least part of the sermon, were wondering if my technique was really that bad.

But it's a little different with an adopted child. I get a pit in my stomach every time someone comments how amazing it is that she put her arms out to everyone. The big smiles and funny faces she displays for perfect strangers actually concern us.

The bonding process that happens so naturally with your own infant is a lot of work with a two year old stranger who comes to live with you; a lot of work, and so infinitely essential to her emotional and spiritual well-being.

So those tears were a sign of deep healing in her soul.

I missed most of the sermon, but I didn't mind. I can always download it some other time.

Continue to pray for Lia as she bonds with her family. Pray for us as we learn how to facilitate that bonding.

20.6 Pounds...Dripping Wet!

Three days short of a month since our last post! It's been quite a ride. Lia has made huge progress, yet there is such a long way to go. Are we overwhelmed? Absolutely. Even as I sit here I have to get up and have a conflict management sessions with the two girls. (Those of you who have more than one child are thinking, "Welcome to my world.")

On the other hand, we have been told that adopting is addictive. Even in the two months we have had Lia we realize this is true. When we watch a child make the gains that Lia has in eight weeks, we can't help but wish we could do the same for all the children we met at the orphanage. She has gained almost five pounds. may not sound like much, but it's a quarter of her total body weight! She has learned so many new words, which have significantly decreased her frustration level...

Instead of throwing something to the floor she says, "help."

Instead of putting her plate full of food on top of her head (Which is what we were told she did in the orphanage) she says, "finished."

Instead of slapping us in the face she says, "no."

She is even spontaneously saying "thank you" when we hand her something she has been asking for.

However, I have to admit, we were not the ones to teach her to say "Amen" at the end of prayers. In fact, to our shame it is sometimes Cecilia who reminds us that we haven't prayed before a meal by folding her hands and blurting out, "Amen."

Today when I went to pick her up at the nursery I was told she is a delight to have in class.

Please continue to pray for us. As I mentioned before, we couldn't ask for better health care. I notice a sparkle in the surgeons eye when she considers the best plan of action for Cecilia's treatment. This is not just a job for her...it's a passion.

Pray that we will be wise as we make major medical decisions. Lia struggles daily with eating and as her parents it's really hard to watch.

Thank you.

I Got Jumped Again...

Before I left for Peru I commented that sometimes my emotions jump me. I would find myself choking back tears that I didn't even know existed. Well, it's happening again...

I decided to write about it so that at least I am sitting in front of a computer instead of a group of friends at church, or a colleague at school. (Not to mention, many of you have been waiting patiently for an update.)

People said Cecilia would receive exceptional care in the U.S. I was told there would be a team of doctors collaborating on my daughter's case. I knew that living close to one of the best children's hospitals in the world would be of great benefit.

But I had no idea...

We met with a surgeon at Children's Memorial Hospital in Chicago. When she walked in she had already been informed of our daughter's story. She was kind, and immediately referred to Lia as "my little girlfriend." After examining Lia's mouth she sat with us and began to explain exactly what our options were. She said that we needed to meet with the ENT (Ears, Nose and Throat specialist) as soon as possible. She also recommended that we set up an appointment with her in the downtown office where her team meets together once a month. (This is where I start to choke a little.) She said she works with a team of five doctors; A dentist, an orthodontist, an ENT, a speech specialist and herself. They would all be there for one reason; my daughter's well-being.

And then I think about how much a 15 minute consultation with any one of those people would cost.

And then I think of Cecilia traveling eight hours on a bus to Lima, where she would wait all day for an appointment in a substandard clinic for three dollars.

And then I realize that there's a really good reason for my emotions to jump me.

I know I don't live in a perfect country. I realize that this nation has made some horrific choices along the way (and continues to do so.) However, I can't help but feel God's blessing as I watch some of the brightest physicians, with the best training, and the greatest resources surround my daughter and do all they can to provide her with the greatest care.

In fact, just this afternoon we received a call from the surgeon's office telling us that Lia has an appointment next week to have an impression taken of her palate for a prosthesis. She said "unfortunately" we would have to go to the office in Chicago instead of the closer branch in Westchester. And again, I think, "Unfortunate would be traveling eight hours for minimal health care."

The road ahead is long and at times daunting. Luciana and I are just beginning to understand what it means to have a child with special needs. But unfortunate we are not...

No... we are truly blessed. Praise be to God.

By the way, there are more new pictures below...

mbp

Reprimanded

Ok... I've been reprimanded by both my wife and sister-in-law for only two pictures, so here are a few more:)

A first attempt at story time, which is a new concept for Lia.

Lia sitting on a cajon peruano (a Peruvian percussion box. My new toy:))

A trip to The Fun Factory while visiting the the grandparents over spring break

Spring blinked at us on Sunday. Lia met all her outside toys...

and her first little friend, Amy.

Home for Mom's Birthday!

You are not going to believe this...

I would like to say we have done exactly what we were told to do after bringing home our newly adopted daughter, but we didn't.

They say to hibernate for a long time with your family, keep visits to a minimum and resist the temptation to take your new child on any trips or excursions.

But how could we have missed my mother's 70th birthday extravaganza? After all, my father and I have been talking about it for seven months.

So five days after returning home (to West Chicago) Luciana, Isabel, and Cecilia got on a plane and flew to Philadelphia International Airport. I hopped in the car and drove the 13 hours home (to Media, PA.) (Now you are wondering why I drove. At 69 years old, my mother has taken up bike riding, so I bought a Calypso Cruiser for her present. It wouldn't fit in the overhead compartment.)

Luciana has said Lia is starting to think she was adopted by a band of gypsies. I think she may be right.

mbp

A New Face in the Old Place

Well, We've been home for 48 hours and I know some of you are itching for some news.

Our trip home was uneventful. Lia blessed us with four hours of sleep during the five hour flight from Lima to Miami. She continued to behave well during the three hour flight to Chicago, as well. And Isa... well, behaved as expected. (Her Juicy Fruit gum was the highlight of the trip for her.)

Five weeks is longer than I realized. It is actually enough time to grow accustomed to many things. So I thought I would just share a few of our "goodbyes" and our "hello agains."

We had no idea when we bought this stroller for 98 soles how important it would become. It saved our backs and our time. It was not only transportation it doubled as "the bad chair." (Not very politically correct.) Err... uhh... I mean the "time out to contemplate how you could have handled that situation a little bit more appropriately chair" Unfortunately, it was too small for the adults in the relationship, who probably could have benefitted from it on more than one occasion.

Isabel made friends with these two young women at the market. She will miss them greatly. They even "babysat" while I walked the market finding goodies and buying things for Lia's benefit sale (Yeah, you heard right. Stay tuned for details...)

What can I say,... I know there are people out there who love the winter; skiing, ice hockey, walking outside in flipflops and shorts through a foot of snow to get the mail, etc.. That's not who we are though. Playing in the fountains in Lima in mid-March is more our style.

We spent more time with our lawyer, Juan Carlos than any other person in Peru. He helped us with anything and everything and never complained or even acted as if something was to much of a hassle. He has become a good friend, and has been invited to our home in Chicago. We hope he will take us up on this offer. (Of course, he will have to brave the U.S. embassy on his own behalf for his visa. Good luck, my friend.)

Oh... and El Enano, where you can get a pitcher of fresh juice of any kind, including things that have no English tanslation for a couple of bucks. I seiously almost had a breakdown when I got on the plane and asked what kinds of juices they had and the response was (you guessed it) orange and apple.

Our dinner at world famous Gaston Acurio's restaurant, Panchita for less than you pay for a meal at TGI Fridays.

On the other hand, we were so happy to come home to a clean house, a warm meal, and fresh flowers, and a monster pile of mail. (Ok, not so happy about the mail...) All reminders of the deep friendship that God has given to us. I snuck in and out of church on Sunday morning, and felt the hand of a close friend on my shoulder, which brought tears to my eyes.

Back to school. Isa sang and talked all the way to school about how much she missed her teacher and friends. She couldn't wait to take her treats to all of her classmates. Everyone walked out of school with a new keychain attached to their backpacks.